WARNING! CONTENTS MAY HAVE SETTLED DURING SHIPMENT!

Disclaimers! I can totally understand when I open the cereal box that yes, some settling will occur. However, when I put on this roll of tp, I thought something was wrong with my tp holder. But unfortunately, even though it has aged greatly, it had not shrunk. Seems like along with the economy, our products are quietly shrinking, too. Is it really the economy or could part of it be because manufacturers can get away with product manipulation without anyone questioning them? Did the toiletpaper corporation actually think I would not notice that they made the rolls shorter? Sold by weight not size?
Remember when we use to buy coffee by the pound? Ice cream use to be 1/2 gallon or 2 quarts? Then it quietly dropped to 1.75 qts. Now even though the price has doubled, some companies have dropped to 1.5 qts. You might not notice, because the container is the same size, but you reach the bottom a lot sooner!?!?! Hmmmmmm.

While we are on the subject of disclaimers!! We hear it all the time:
One size fits most. (especially if you are 5'6", weigh 110# and are a 34B)
Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear.
Batteries not included.
The best things in life are free.
Many suitcases look alike.
May be hazardous to your health.
May cause anal leakage. (Be sure and wear brown pants and have a change of clothes when eating this product!?!)
Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.
Do not remove tags under penalty of law. (My mattress is 40 years old, but still has the tag on!!)
Some assembly required. (May even take all Christmas Eve night, and you will be asleep on the floor with the wrench in your hand as the children gleefully come in to see what "Santa" left them.)

So in closing, keep in mind that no animals were harmed in the writing of this blog and I am not affiliated in any way with CNN, MSN, ABC, NBC,CBS,BBC,PBS,WGN, ESPN, TBS, TNT, US or Fox NEWS. But above all,remember that
"in the event of a non-traditional landing, your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device!!!!!"